A Suitable Helper
Preparation is a process, it can sometimes be difficult and you will never fully arrive. Preparing to be a suitable helpmate for marriage is even more difficult because it requires you to dedicate your life to supporting the purpose of your spouse. Part of being prepared to be a suitable helpmate to your husband requires you to know God and yourself. Once you are clear on 1) who God is and 2) Who you are in God, then you can begin to discover who you are in the life of someone else.
In Genesis 2:18 the Lord God said, "it is not good for man to be alone I will make a helper suitable for him." How do we become a helper suitable for someone? We would have to look at that person’s need and then we could determine whether or not we were a good fit. This is the way companies hire employee’s. They decide what the overall vision and purpose of the company is and hire a person in line with that. It is important in this process that you are totally honest with yourself about who you are and what your purpose is. If you are not, then both you and your future spouse will have a difficult time.
If you are currently dating then look at your relationship. Does your life purpose complement your significant other? Will it complement them in the future? For example (in its most simplistic form), if you are dating a person who wants to open a chain of barbecue restaurants but you are a staunch supporter of animal rights, and a vegetarian, you all will probably not be a great fit for one another. If you all get married there is a high probability that you will find it difficult to support one another’s vision. If you cannot fully support your significant other’s purpose in life then can you truly be a suitable helpmate?
If you are not dating anyone then identifying his qualities will be very difficult so look at what you feel you are called to. Pray about why God placed you here. If you feel called to be a missionary and travel the world you would likely be well suited to a person who wants to do the same thing, or do something that does not compete with the constant travel of a missionary. Thus, a person who wants to start a community center in their local hometown might find the nomadic lifestyle of a missionary difficult because their purpose may require them to be in the same location consistently.
In Amos 2:2, the bible states, "can two walk together unless they agree." It is very difficult for two people to be united as one but work to advance two different agendas, they must be on the same page working toward the same cause.
When you make your list I suggest jotting down what your purpose and vision is for your life and pray about what type of man you would best compliment. Be specific when creating the list but do not become married to it. More importantly be led by God when you make the list and allow him to change your heart if that is his will. What type of person are you best suited for?